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MONDAY’S POEM: Homecoming

December 23, 2013 Leave a comment

I found this poem in a notebook stored from another time. I had written it for our daughter for Christmas exactly 20 years ago . She was coming home from school; and I remembered some of my own homecomings from when I would return from college.

And here it is Christmas again. Many will be coming home; perhaps there will be some resonance with this:

Homecoming

Sitting in the car
Outside the door
Emotions racing
I hesitated.

I knew all would
Be the same.
Nothing changed.
Not all was good;
Not all was bad.

Mixed – like life
I faced my future,
Opened my door,
Stepped out,
Breathed the fresh,
Unchanged country air.

I glanced around,
Saw the familiar
Scene remembered
For so long now,
Beyond remembering.
Time mingled with
Space – things froze.

I broke the spell
With a shake; stepped
Forward toward
The door with the
Weathered knob
And turned it open.

The threshold seemed
A barrier, not an entry.
A gateless gate from now
To the past; to the future?
I needed to know!

So I crossed over;
Inhaled the sameness;
Devoured the love waiting –
I was back home.

©1993 Richard W. Bredeson. All rights reserved.

Have a very happy “homecoming”!

Harvest Full Moon, Autumnal Equinox, Homecoming and More

September 20, 2013 Leave a comment

As I wrote in yesterday’s post I am visiting my brothers on the family farm in Wisconsin. I was here for yesterday’s full moon; it was huge and bright here as only it can be in the countryside where it still gets much darker at night than what I usually experience on the east coast. Here is where I got part of my starry-eyed wanderlust when I was a kid looking up at the brilliant night sky, the dense and bright Milky Way streaking overhead and the astounding constellations of the Wheel revolving through the seasons. I was thrilled to see the aurora borealis occasionally in the cold winter nights. And I always loved the rising of Sirius around the time of my birthday. The sky part of being back here hasn’t changed over the years; I can still come back to that.

To celebrate the Full Moon we were out in my brother’s garden bringing in a pail full of green beans, a few remaining peas, an awesome head of cauliflower and some still sweat lettuce coming back after welcome rain. So we did our harvesting for the day and are now enjoying the bounty.

And I’ll be here for the Equinox on Sunday – equal parts night and day. This will be a time for reflecting on balance. And it is good to be here in the place I grew up to ponder the balance in my life: the maturing urbanite and the farm-boy, the world traveler and the small-town bumpkin, the spiritual seeker with the grounded and earthy dirt-farmer son. It is always a good thing to look for balance, not just at equinoxes, but all through the year. Balance begins with inner reflection; the inner is always reflected outwardly. Outer signs of balance, like Sunday’s Equinox, are there to remind us to go inside to find the balance.

I must admit I am somewhat unbalanced by this visit to the family farm; as I wrote yesterday I have discovered it is no longer “home” for me; not even a little bit. I continue to reconcile, or balance, this finding for myself. I think I will be doing some grounding work when I get back to Maryland; the grounding that may have been a vestige of my youth here in Wisconsin needs to be transplanted once and for all. Or maybe it just needs to be replanted in my heart as the physical grounding to place recedes as an important element in my life.

Sandwiched between Full Moon and Equinox is my 50th High School reunion! I will be joining my former classmates for a dinner tonight. Will I recognize anyone? Yesterday my brother and I had breakfast in the hometown café; a couple was also in the restaurant; I knew I knew them but could not place faces with names. The wife recognized me not by my looks but by my voice! And I thought I had worked so hard to neutralize my Wisconsin accent! Betty Lou, three years my senior, looks much the same as when we rode the school bus together the seven miles into town. But recalling names is quite another matter. I hope they give us nametags so I’m not guessing wrong!

Saturday is the big Homecoming event: parade (my class will have a float of some kind since we are one of the honored classes), football (one of my nephews will play) and the evening “banquet” (I put this in quotes because it is probably not what you think; substitute glasses of milk for a fine offering of wine and you’ll get the picture!)

I’ll spend Sunday visiting and catching up with family. I fly home on Monday to get back to routines, qigong classes and a re-balancing. And I’ll take a piece of my old “home” with me in my heart.

Where do you call home? Do you attend school reunions? How do you balance all the experiences of “home” with your life now? Take a peak inside for the answers.