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ROSEMARY’S EXPLORATION: Know Thyself – Tools for Self-Knowledge

August 20, 2014 1 comment

How well do you know who you are, really?

Of course, you know your name, your physical history, where you were born, etc. You might know your Sun sign to look up a horoscope in the newspaper. You probably know your parents’ names and your grandparents’ names. But who are you, really?

Do you know your thinking style? Do you know where your attention goes when you are presented with a situation or event? Do you know your Life Purpose, your Life School and your Life Lesson or Blind Spot? Have you examined your limiting beliefs? How about those negative self-talk thoughts you carry around with you? Are you clear about your values and your priorities?

I could continue the list but it is too long. There are so many facets to a human being, so many aspects to the personality, that we often think we are simpler beings than we really are.

And what is true for you is true for everyone around you.

For example, you have a certain learning style. Most folks are visual learners. They process information by seeing it. Have you noticed that you remember something better if you see it written than if you just hear it? That’s because your preferred learning style is visual.

Some people are auditory learners. They need to hear material so that they can better learn and remember. For these folks, just seeing the written word isn’t good enough – they need to also hear it spoken or to speak it aloud themselves.

Now if you are a visual learner, you use phrases that reflect this, like ‘Do you see what I am saying?’ or, ‘How does this look to you?’ If, however, you are an auditory learner, you resonate better with language that reflects hearing, like ‘Did you hear about this?’ or ‘How does this sound to you?’

Can you see/hear how this difference can impact communication between two people?

This is only one example of how important it is to know something about yourself.

What about other tools for self-knowledge that give you more detailed information about your tendencies and inherent energies? Astrology. Numerology. Enneagram. Myers-Briggs. DISC. Scientific Hand Analysis. Chinese 5-elements. Your Chinese astrology star number. There is a long list of ways that you can understand yourself more deeply.

Have you explored tools to help you understand where you are coming from? What about where others are coming from? Do you value the differences in how people approach learning, or life, or do you expect everyone to see things as you see them? To listen and to hear exactly what you hear? To feel the way you feel?

Remember that:

All Love Flows from Self-Love.

To love another you must first love yourself. Learn more about yourself and love it all. There is nothing better about one Enneagram type over another, but the more you understand about your tendencies the more conscious you can be about choosing how to respond to stimulus as it is presented to you. One Astrological chart is as good as another but they can carry very different lessons for the person to learn.

I can often shift a person from feeling conflicted to being more peaceful simply by pointing out how differing human beings can look at the same scene and describe differing points of view. This is most beneficial if you know your own point of view first.

Explore tools for self-knowledge and get to know yourself better. It can change your life!

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You Are Being Lied To! – Richard’s Commentary

June 5, 2014 Leave a comment

I don’t know about you but I lie to myself all the time. And part of “growing up” is to catch myself doing it, question why, and the underlying beliefs that trigger the lies, and then digging down underneath the beliefs to work on rewiring the neurology or filling in the ruts in the neural pathways that entrenched the beliefs underpinning the lies.

Here’s an example: I use the word “never” a lot! “I will never win that prize.” “I will never figure out a way to stop misplacing my glasses.” “I will never get published.” The “nevers” go on and on.

There seems to be a negative trench in my brain that too often goes to the improbability of something happening rather than to the possibility! Part of this is the way I came into the world, my genetic wiring. And part of it was the way I was raised, the environmental wiring. We all have these vestige neural pathways carved into us; some more deeply than others.

But there is good news here; neuro-biology is examining the “neuro-plasticity” of the human brain and discovering that we can change the way we think. Ruts in the plastic can be worn deeply by repeated thoughts, beliefs, lies. But they can also be modified, filled in, redirected through conscious choice.

This is Rosemary’s whole point in her article about the lies we tell ourselves. And here’s the paragraph that helps me the most:

Now LAUGH!!! Feel how good it feels. You DESERVE to laugh, no matter what is going on in your life, no matter where you are, there is something to laugh about. I just looked out the window at a squirrel trying to get into a squirrel-proof bird feeder. Do you think the squirrel thinks that, just because he can’t get any birdseed out of it, there’s something wrong with him, that he’s not ‘good enough’ to be worthy of food? Heck, no! That squirrel goes around the corner of the house, climbs the tree to the non-squirrel-proof bird feeder, hangs upside down, and eats his fill. Only we humans compare ourselves to some mythological standard and find that we don’t measure up.

There is nothing wrong with me. We all have negative thoughts about ourselves, but these are lies buried in the beliefs we carry that no longer serve us.

I once had an Enneagram teacher ask me: “what if the world is perfect just the way it is?” I was stunned at first. Then I laughed; and I relaxed! Yeah, the world is perfect and I am perfect. The lessons come to help us become more perfect.

One of my lessons is to replace “never” with “sometimes” in my thoughts about myself– and every time I do I get to laugh! Through this practice maybe that “never rut” will begin to fill in. And when it is gone, when that lie disappears maybe I can replace “sometimes” with “always”!

How are you lying to yourself? How are you catching yourself doing it? Find a practice to rewire your neurology; pave over the old ruts and believe in your inner light!