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ROSEMARY’S EXPLORATION: What’s Your Umbrella?
Or, to look at it another way, what are you using to protect you from the storms of life?
As I look out at the heavy rains that are falling, I wonder how often we rush to our raincoats and umbrellas to make sure we don’t get rained on. Metaphorically, we do the same thing. We rush to protect ourselves from whatever is happening around us so that we don’t have to deal with the depths of the implications or meanings.
Sometimes this can be as simple as avoiding making a painful phone call or finding an excuse to procrastinate on handling something complicated. But I also find that it is easy to stay on the surface and avoid digging deeply into the personal growth work that is available to us in the midst of a storm of life.
For example, have you ever had the experience of being in the middle of turmoil in your life and you find yourself searching for the quick fix, the way out, the end to the pain instead of seeking the deeper meaning and the personal lesson that is hiding inside the situation? We’ve all done this, but as we move along our spiritual journey we learn to seek out the deeper lessons and to get those lessons learned before they return in a more insistent way.
That is what they do. The lessons are there for you to learn what you need to learn to grow into your highest self. They are presented in different guises so that you have plenty of opportunities to figure out how to grow from them. And they don’t go away until you really get what you need to learn.
So your choice is always to learn it now or learn it later.
May I give you a piece of advice, based on personal experience? Learn it now. When lessons return because we’ve been hiding out from them they usually come in a more powerful way so that they are sure to get our attention. I jokingly say that I am focused on finding the lessons and learning them when they are subtly appearing without waiting for them to turn into two by fours to the head!
In what ways you are avoiding the work that can advance you on your journey? Are you thinking about doing some journaling but can’t seem to find the time? Would you like to meditate but you don’t want to learn how just yet? Do you know that you are not being as successful, satisfied, fulfilled as you wish and yet you don’t feel ready to get the help that might bring you that success, satisfaction, fulfillment?
All you have is NOW. The lessons don’t go away. The Universe wants you to have that success, satisfaction and fulfillment and puts lessons on your path so that you can clear the blocks and achieve your dreams. Why delay that?
It’s usually fear. But the rewards of doing the work, of learning the lessons, are so much greater than the pain of getting there that it’s worth it to start now.
Get the help. Do the work. Learn the lessons.
And, when the next storm comes, you can happily dance in the rain!
ROSEMARY’S INSPIRATION: What is Your Umbrella?
Rosemary’s “Two-Minute” Video for this Week: What is Your Umbrella?
Blocked? – Richard’s Commentary
It was a bright, sunny day with low humidity and a light breeze – a lovely June day in Maryland. I stopped at the bank on the way home to get some cash for the farmers’ market the next day. Because it was a sunny, bright day I wore my new “reader sunglasses” – sunglasses with a bifocal area for magnification to aid these aging eyes when reading in bright light. I needed to take them off to see the ATM screen at the bank; I placed them on the handy ledge below the machine.
I was halfway home when I realized I wasn’t wearing my sunglasses – my route is shady and the light less bright. I quick search of my many-pocketed vest – my alternative to carrying a purse – turned up empty. Reverse, dash back to the bank – no sunglasses on the ledge. Inside the bank the teller I know by name is free – “did anyone turn in a pair of sunglasses in the last few minutes?” She looks at other tellers and in their lost-and-found area – “no, sorry.”
I am disappointed – mostly in myself. Why these lapses? And when will I listen to my unconscious mind, my intuition? You see, when I placed my sunglasses on that little ledge under the ATM I had a brief glimpse of forgetting them there – just a flash. And I may even have muttered to myself – “don’t forget your sunglasses there.”
If I listened to that voice my unconscious mind heard “forget your sunglasses there.” The unconscious mind does not process negatives. It only hears and processes positive statements – I learned this in hypnosis and NLP training when I went to a few classes with Rosemary when she was earning her certifications.
So, how am I blocked from listening to my intuition, changing my language used in “self-talk” to make only positive statement and become more fully aware, in every moment, of what is going on within me and all around me? And, what do I do about it?
Here’s what Rosemary writes in her post about this subject:
Be grateful for your unconscious mind. It keeps your heart pumping and your brain functioning and your lungs breathing and a whole lot of other processes operating in your life without your having to consciously make things happen. However, that same unconscious mind is operating in ways that can cause patterns and blocks that you might not know consciously, and might not have chosen if you did know, and you struggle with understanding why you can’t get things done or why you seem to be blocked from your successes.
Yes, that seems true for me and does explain the blockage to becoming fully aware so that sunglasses are not lost. Is there a solution to the blocks; a way to move into full awareness?
Rosemary writes: …if you are reading these words, then you are called to continue forward on your path. Take a step in the direction of your dreams. If you feel blocked, if you stumble, rejoice that you are growing. There are ways to see beyond what is holding you back. There are tools to help you and people to support you in your growth.
Another lesson, another growth opportunity. Is this what my lost sunglasses episode is telling me? Here you can imagine hearing a loud groan!
It was just about a year ago (June 28, 2013, as a matter of fact) that I wrote a similar post here titled “Awareness.” In that post I told the Zen tale of Nan-in and Tenno. The master, Nan-in, asked Tenno when he arrived on a rainy day to which side of the door he had placed his umbrella and clogs on entering Nan-in’s house. Tenno could not answer; he studied at the feet of Nan-in for 10 more years to become fully aware!
I guess this means I have another nine years to go, another nine years of practice and study and “lessons in lost sunglasses”!
ROSEMARY’S INSPIRATION: Ask “What’s Holding Me Back?”
Rosemary’s “Two-Minute” Video for this Week: Ask “What’s Holding Me Back?”
PS: Did you get the word that Rosemary’s Possibilities Playshop has moved on the calendar? We have moved it to the Summer Solstice, June 21, 2014. Time: 10:00 AM to 2:00 PM; place: Severna Park, Maryland. Early-bird registration here
The Playshop is your opportunity to break through those blocks!
And if you are not in the Maryland/DC area watch for the opportunity to purchase the digital recordings.
MONDAY’S POEM: Awareness and Action
I published today’s poem here about a year ago. I publish it again as a reminder and as a setup for my post coming on Thursday: a commentary on Rosemary’s article Blocked? and an exploration of my own blocks that seem to hold me in unawareness.
The poem’s reference to Nan-in and Tenno is to a classic Zen story.
Awareness and Action
A million bits of information
Streaming from a thousand sources.
Are you aware of seven or nine?
Your unconscious mind
Absorbs it all!
Awareness is a nebulous thing:
Seven, nine, ten-thousand things
Add to consciousness moment
To moment even as we sleep.
Absorb it all?
Nan-in asks Tenno umbrella to clogs,
Left or right? Ten-thousand bits
Lost in unconsciousness. Ten more
Years of Awareness practice;
Absorb it all!
Practice in Action. It is all
Practice! For what you ask;
How will you ever know
Bliss if you don’t
Absorb it All?
©2013 Richard W. Bredeson. All rights reserved.
A FRIDAY POEM FROM “RHYTHMS AND CYCLES” – What Is This?
Today’s poem doesn’t exactly belong in the “Rhythms and Cycles” collection; and yet, the lessons come at us, sometimes in waves. And we have to deal with the lessons as they come. I learned this Koan through an article in Tricycle magazine several years ago and do apply it often when I catch myself in the midst of some crisis (lesson). The practice is to ask this question when something disrupts the flow of life. And when the first answer arises, ask the question again. Continue this cyclic, nested examining, analyzing and asking, spiraling in until a satisfactory answer manifests. Try it the next time you meet up with frustration!
What Is This?
A Koan in the Korean Zen tradition:
When impatience arises ask
What is this?
A question to penetrate to the essence.
When fear stares from the mirror ask
What is this?
A lesson in each waking moment.
When doubt and despair assail ask
What is this?
An offering to self and life and growth.
When wonder and joy abound ask
What is this?
©2014 Richard W. Bredeson. All rights reserved.
You Are Being Lied To! – Richard’s Commentary
I don’t know about you but I lie to myself all the time. And part of “growing up” is to catch myself doing it, question why, and the underlying beliefs that trigger the lies, and then digging down underneath the beliefs to work on rewiring the neurology or filling in the ruts in the neural pathways that entrenched the beliefs underpinning the lies.
Here’s an example: I use the word “never” a lot! “I will never win that prize.” “I will never figure out a way to stop misplacing my glasses.” “I will never get published.” The “nevers” go on and on.
There seems to be a negative trench in my brain that too often goes to the improbability of something happening rather than to the possibility! Part of this is the way I came into the world, my genetic wiring. And part of it was the way I was raised, the environmental wiring. We all have these vestige neural pathways carved into us; some more deeply than others.
But there is good news here; neuro-biology is examining the “neuro-plasticity” of the human brain and discovering that we can change the way we think. Ruts in the plastic can be worn deeply by repeated thoughts, beliefs, lies. But they can also be modified, filled in, redirected through conscious choice.
This is Rosemary’s whole point in her article about the lies we tell ourselves. And here’s the paragraph that helps me the most:
Now LAUGH!!! Feel how good it feels. You DESERVE to laugh, no matter what is going on in your life, no matter where you are, there is something to laugh about. I just looked out the window at a squirrel trying to get into a squirrel-proof bird feeder. Do you think the squirrel thinks that, just because he can’t get any birdseed out of it, there’s something wrong with him, that he’s not ‘good enough’ to be worthy of food? Heck, no! That squirrel goes around the corner of the house, climbs the tree to the non-squirrel-proof bird feeder, hangs upside down, and eats his fill. Only we humans compare ourselves to some mythological standard and find that we don’t measure up.
There is nothing wrong with me. We all have negative thoughts about ourselves, but these are lies buried in the beliefs we carry that no longer serve us.
I once had an Enneagram teacher ask me: “what if the world is perfect just the way it is?” I was stunned at first. Then I laughed; and I relaxed! Yeah, the world is perfect and I am perfect. The lessons come to help us become more perfect.
One of my lessons is to replace “never” with “sometimes” in my thoughts about myself– and every time I do I get to laugh! Through this practice maybe that “never rut” will begin to fill in. And when it is gone, when that lie disappears maybe I can replace “sometimes” with “always”!
How are you lying to yourself? How are you catching yourself doing it? Find a practice to rewire your neurology; pave over the old ruts and believe in your inner light!
ROSEMARY’S EXPLORATION: You Are Being Lied To!
Have you thought about what you think about? Too often, our thoughts crop up into consciousness and we don’t examine their source or their validity. We think that they are true because we have believed them for so long.
But many times we lie to ourselves based on what we used to believe and we don’t even realize that we are doing it!
Have you ever looked in a mirror and criticized your appearance? Have you ever compared yourself or your life to someone else’s and envied them because you believe that they have more/are better/are more beautiful/lucky/loved than you are? Have you ever felt that you are not ‘good enough’?
You have been lying to yourself! But you can decide TODAY to change that.
We humans have the ability to create a reality that exists only in our own head. Does it really matter that someone told you once that you were ugly, probably because they were jealous of how much better looking they thought you were? And you were both 6 years old. But the 6-year-old you that lives in your unconscious mind still hears the word ‘ugly’ and believes it. You are not ugly! If you are reading these words you are a beautiful Light in the world. Smile! Right this minute, no matter where you are or what you are doing, smile. Beautiful! Even if you feel as if you have nothing to smile about, smile because Rosemary asked you to smile, right now, just as you are.
Now LAUGH!!! Feel how good it feels. You DESERVE to laugh, no matter what is going on in your life, no matter where you are, there is something to laugh about. I just looked out the window at a squirrel trying to get into a squirrel-proof bird feeder. Do you think the squirrel thinks that, just because he can’t get any birdseed out of it, there’s something wrong with him, that he’s not ‘good enough’ to be worthy of food? Heck, no! That squirrel goes around the corner of the house, climbs the tree to the non-squirrel-proof bird feeder, hangs upside down, and eats his fill. Only we humans compare ourselves to some mythological standard and find that we don’t measure up.
We can lie to ourselves and not even realize that we are doing it.
So even if things are not going well for you right now in your life, it is not because you are not worthy of great joy, peace, abundance, love. You might be lying to yourself about the definitions of those words, but you are worthy, you are good enough.
Life brings you a lesson to learn in every situation. You did the best you could do with every situation that you have faced up to now. Congratulations! And you will continue to do the best you can with the resources that you have in every situation that you face.
Now that you have completed a lot of lessons in life, isn’t it time to do the personal growth work to ferret out those old thoughts and beliefs that you decided to believe based on something that happened in your childhood? Does it really matter to you that you were picked last for the kickball team? Are you not good enough because Johnny in first grade said something mean to you? If Mary was jealous of your grades in high school she might have criticized your clothes. Are you going to let that guide you when you go shopping for a new outfit today?
You CAN stop lying to yourself when you discover what those insidious lies are! Do the work to uncover them. Find out, from your unconscious mind, what beliefs pop in that have no place in today’s reality and clear them out. They are blocking you from manifesting your magnificence in this amazing 21st Century!
No more lies! You are beautiful, worthy, good enough, amazing and lovable! And if the person in the mirror has trouble believing that, then tell them that, “Rosemary says so, and she doesn’t lie!”
ROSEMARY’S INSPIRATION: You Are Being Lied To!
Rosemary’s “Three-Minute” Video for this Week: You Are Being Lied To!
MONDAY’S POEM: The Unfamiliar
I sense we are in a transition period. I’m feeling a bit betwixt and between. We are just moving into June; spring seems behind us, yet it’s not yet summer. Some graduations are behind us, yet, many are still in school. We are well into the New Moon, yet it is just now showing on the Western horizon just after Sunset.
It is within this transitory energy that I came across a poem I wrote under similar circumstances several months ago. If you are feeling a little unsettled, perhaps approaching some as yet unknown transition, you too may resonate with this.
The Unfamiliar
Different, strange,
Dark, peculiar,
Low energy,
Unfamiliar.
Rest in this new
Environment.
Take it easy,
Let it ferment.
Adjustments come
To all who wait.
There is no rush,
Just hesitate.
Relax, just be;
There’s time to know
And when it’s right,
There’s time to go.
©2014 Richard W. Bredeson. All rights reserved.
Men and The Goddess 