Home > Lessons for the Modern Man, Men and Spirituality, Mystic Messages, Thoughts on Mystic Messages > The Story is Not the Person! – Richard’s Commentary-Part 2

The Story is Not the Person! – Richard’s Commentary-Part 2

“The story is not the person.” But the person is part of the human story, as I wrote in my post yesterday. There is so much to Rosemary’s article posted Wednesday that I wanted to come at it from another angle.

She wrote of boundaries that people have that must be respected. We have them to protect our inner vulnerabilities. We all have these soft spots that can cause us great harm if exposed (at least that’s what we believe). But these boundaries can also become barriers to growth, to expansion, to the evolution of human consciousness I wrote about yesterday. There is a balance needed here that I want to explore today.

Rosemary writes: “Each of us has a responsibility to ourselves and to others to learn how to live in community with the people around us. We are not private islands with ‘No Trespassing’ signs on our foreheads! The most important lesson to learn about living in a civilized society is to learn what healthy boundaries are. Learn what to let in and what belongs to the other person.”

The question this begs is what are these healthy boundaries? Until we gain the answer here we may be hiding behind unhealthy boundaries (barriers) and blocking our own growth.

We all have secrets. We are human, we grow up in human families with foibles, stresses and all the baggage of generations of growing up in human families. Some secrets like those from our youth don’t necessarily need to see the light of day. If they served their purpose in teaching us then they can remain hidden; no harm done.

But if we have not yet learned the lessons from these secrets then perhaps they do need to be aired, to see the light. This is particularly true if the secrets, the unlearned lessons, are blocking our growth in some way.

Another form of boundary is the façade we erect to pretend we are someone other than the person we know on the inside.  This is our persona; and we all have them. In fact we likely have several of them we “wear” in different situations. And this too is OK. We don’t necessarily want to expose the “real” person behind the persona in every social situation.

But if we always hide behind a persona in every situation we may be hiding something even from ourselves that needs to be examined. Our persona may form a barrier to our own true story that we need to understand. That story is the base for our expansion, growth, evolution.

The healthy boundary comes from a balance between over-exposure and hiding, between blurting out old, irrelevant information and withholding information that might help us better understand ourselves and others. With healthy boundaries in place we can move easily in society, learn as we interact with others and grow beyond those boundaries.

As Rosemary concludes: “Own your story but do not be governed by it. Be conscious of your responsibility to continue to grow. Help others to grow by allowing them to have their own stories while keeping healthy boundaries for yourself.”

Do you “own your story”? Does it set up healthy boundaries or barriers to your growth? The place to begin to answer these questions is to write your story down. It may have some lessons, some hidden gems that need to be mined!

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