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Stay Happy Through the Holidays – Richard’s Commentary
Today, the holiday festivities all begin with the day we set aside here in the US to give thanks. I’ve been giving thanks, writing notes of gratitude in my “morning pages” this week. I began my thank you notes, giving deep gratitude for my incredible partner, wife and love of my life, Rosemary. And if you have been following our blogs and reading our posts you know what a talented and resourceful woman she is. Her advice for conscious living and spiritual evolution are profound and creative. And her advice for the holidays is no different! She suggests:
The first step to staying happy through the holidays is to do a realistic and honest assessment of this time of year for yourself.
This may sound superficial but do you move into this time of year with a perspective of staying happy? We have all heard the stories of people who are alone, who dread the holidays because they don’t get along with family, who feel bad because they can’t afford to give elaborate or expensive gifts, who party and drink their way through the season. Perspective is an all-important first step to be happy in every moment.
Next Rosemary suggests:
Consider a new way of operating through the holidays this year.
Everyone around you is struggling with their own life lessons. Somehow the holidays come with Hallmark Cards and Norman Rockwell expectations that nobody really experiences. If you put self-care at the top of your agenda, IT IS NOT SELFISH!!!! Let me repeat that – Self-Care is not being self-ish!!!
Self-Care – in other words, give yourself the gift of looking out for you! Attend to your health, prepare wholesome meals for your celebrations, if you drink alcohol moderate your intake, stay warm and especially keep your neck and throat protected and warm, keep moving with yoga or qigong or another body practice, take time to meditate and if you don’t meditate this season is a great time to start, celebrate the special holidays in your tradition – make them Holy, honor everyone you meet as learning their lessons just as you are – they are you!
Compassion begins with yourself. Taking care of you is taking care of everyone. Recall Rosemary’s question in her inspirational video posted Tuesday: “can compassion for yourself equal compassion for them?” She goes on to suggest:
Look at your calendar for the rest of 2013 and decide what you will do for yourself. Rest. Relax. Pamper yourself. Watch movies that make you smile. Hang out with friends or go on a silent retreat.
As we approach the Winter Solstice, one of those special holidays we celebrate, it is a good time to go inside, to do the inner work of deep winter. The Ancients took this time to retreat, to look inward for the coming renewal. Deep inner work is another way to take care of yourself on the personal level and all others on the global level. This is true compassion!
Coming back to Thanksgiving I took Rosemary’s advice and turned inward to give thanks for me. I am grateful for my soul path, my spiritual journey back to myself, I am grateful for the health and strength to make this journey, I am grateful to myself for making the commitment, I honor myself for my discipline and I am grateful for all of the spiritual teachers and guides that hold me in their love and compassion.
Be grateful for yourself! I am grateful for you because I know you are supporting me on my journey.
Have wonderful, blessed and happy holidays!
ROSEMARY’S EXPLORATION: Stay Happy Through the Holidays!
It’s that time of year when the stores seem to reach out to grab you to come inside and spend your money. The meals and parties get you focused on food and drink. You have to make sure you can get to all the events, have the right clothes, the right gifts, the travel arrangements. And for many it is a time of overwhelm.
For others, though, it is a very lonely time. You might be worried about finances and wishing you had more money with which to buy gifts. You might not have any family to visit or they are too far away. You might be looking at the holidays with no plans or parties or meals to attend.
And for a few you might have family gatherings in which to participate that you are not really anticipating with pleasure.
Even those who love the holiday season can have expectations that are not met and, thus, experience disappointment.
Let’s make this year the year of truly ‘Happy Holidays’ no matter what your personal circumstances might be!
The first step to staying happy through the holidays is to do a realistic and honest assessment of this time of year for yourself. Do you really need to buy everything that you usually do? Do you need to put as much pressure on yourself as you usually do? Do you need to attend every party? Every gathering?
What is your energy level now, as the holidays approach? Do you need more rest and self-care than you need excitement and company? Why not choose a different pattern to your holidays this year?
How are your finances? Do you get stressed out by spending before the end of the year and then worrying about the bills in January? Do you buy a lot of gifts because you feel you must instead of genuinely wanting to share?
The honest assessment leads you to understand what YOU need in this season.
Next, ask yourself if you really must spend time with people who upset and disturb you or if you can find time for yourself without that burden this year. This might even be your family. Are you looking forward to seeing them or do you dread the time you spend there?
Consider a new way of operating through the holidays this year.
Everyone around you is struggling with their own life lessons. Somehow the holidays come with Hallmark Cards and Norman Rockwell expectations that nobody really experiences. If you put self-care at the top of your agenda, IT IS NOT SELFISH!!!! Let me repeat that – Self-Care is not being self-ish!!!
Taking care of yourself might be limiting what you spend this season to what you can comfortably afford. Make some gifts. Give away something that’s meaningful to you and share its story with the recipient. Go to bazaars and thrift shops and find unusual items that will delight someone.
Look at your calendar for the rest of 2013 and decide what you will do for yourself. Rest. Relax. Pamper yourself. Watch movies that make you smile. Hang out with friends or go on a silent retreat. If you’re lonely, find a shelter where they need volunteers. If you’re overwhelmed with social ‘obligations,’ decide how to handle the schedule to preserve your energy for the activities that matter most to you. Ask for help if you need it.
Spend some time planning for 2014. This doesn’t have to mean the big New Year’s Resolution list, but pick a theme for the year that resonates with your heart. Delight yourself with your plans. Dream BIG!!!
Remember that everyone around you has something going on in their life that they are having to handle. Take care of yourself so that you can show up fully present to everyone else. Be CURIOUS . This helps to keep you focused on the mysteries and not on what upsets you. Have healthy boundaries. Eat healthy foods. Take care of your own health.
Everyone is doing the best they can with the resources they have at any given moment – even you!
May you truly have Happy Holidays this year!
PS: Need help making it a happy holiday time? Looking for guidance and additional resources from beyond the norm? You can receive personal messages from Guides, Spirits, Angels and loved ones who have crossed over at Rosemary’s next event: a Conversation with The Other Side December 6 at 7:00 pm Eastern. Click for details
ROSEMARY’S INSPIRATION: Find Compassion in Yourself
Rosemary’s “Three-Minute” video for the week: Find Compassion in Yourself
Note: this clip was taken from our November gathering for Satsang.
PS: You too may experience channeled messages from Rosemary. In fact you can receive personal messages from Guides, Spirits, Angels and loved ones who have crossed over at the next event: a Conversation with The Other SideDecember 6 at 7:00 pm Eastern. Click for details
MONDAY’S POEM: Surrender
It’s been a heck of a week since my last poem post on Monday – quite a “journey”! But I am coming around and accepting the journey openly and with excitement! Stay tuned! Meanwhile I can only recommend:
Surrender
It is a struggle to let go
of everything that holds life
Together.
The ego doesn’t release easily
without a fight for its life
Together.
The pain of release can hold
on for years, life times, all
Together.
The call to surrender is not one
to follow a path of ease, but
Another.
The path of wisdom and compassion
for all sentient beings is distinctly
Another.
It is a path the ego rejects
out of blind fear of death, yes
Another!
Surrender; choose death for joy!
©2013 Richard W. Bredeson. All rights reserved.
Necessity – The Mother of Invention
In yesterday’s post I offered a story about how I assess what is necessary in my life. As I get older less seems like more to me. I do know the leaves this year seem more abundant, heavier, and they just keep falling! I need to get out there and rake again.
I also mentioned, almost in passing, that there is a spiritual component to my sore-from-raking shoulder that both Rosemary and I have picked up on: And the spiritual? Rosemary detects that my heart-mind center is opening. It does feel like something is opening on the one hand; but the constriction feels more like something is struggling to stay closed. Why is there such a struggle for this opening?
I think I got my answer to this during our second Unlocking the Mysteries of Intuition class the other evening. Rosemary quoted a poem by Rumi:
New organs of perception come into being as a result of necessity.
Therefore, O man,
increase your necessity,
so that you may increase your perception.
Am I growing a new organ? Is this what the heart-mind center Rosemary speaks and teaches about is? A new organ of perception?
I am reminded here that “necessity is the mother of invention.” Or in my case, necessity is the mother of a new organ of perception! Am I creating this necessity? And if I am what am I struggling to “see” with this new organ. The way it is feeling this organ isn’t even fully formed yet. It is still fighting to get out of the “eggshell of my shoulder.”
The heart-mind center as I understand it is a merging of the heart center and the higher centers of throat and third-eye. It is a center for the blending of feeling and thought. I have also seen it referred to as the “high heart.” And I have been working on this center, breathing into it during yoga and qigong practice, balancing it along with my other chakras through breathing exercises. Has my work brought on this opening?
And where is the necessity in this? I’m not sure I have consciously set about to increase my necessity. In fact I am looking for ways to decrease what I find to be necessary in my life. But I have the sense that I am not dealing with material necessities here at all!
Both Rosemary and I have written about the evolution of human consciousness. Much of her teaching through the October Satsang event was on this subject and we have published several clips from that evening on this blog. If humanity is to evolve into the 21st century I believe we will need these new organs of perception Rumi wrote about in the 13th century!
And while I might be excited about this evolutionary journey we are on, I didn’t realize there would be pain involved!
Meanwhile those new fallen leaves are piling up!
Assess the Necessity – Richard’s Commentary
Rosemary asks some tough questions in her blog-post yesterday. The key here is to review our values, especially with the question: “how much is enough?” in mind. Rosemary’s challenge: it is important to decide consciously what is a necessity in Your Life.
The first thing that comes to my mind when I ask this of myself is health. I have been struggling for a week with a debilitating pain in my shoulder. I brought this on myself, raking leaves like a madman a week or so ago. And I felt reasonably good doing it. I did and do realize I’m not 40-something any longer. I took my time and only did the front yard. And I expected some stiffness as an after-effect. I did wake up with a few sore muscles the next day. And then it got worse, and worse. Yesterday, over a week later I was almost unable to move without pain. And I realized health, feeling reasonably physically well, is close to the top of my list of necessities.
Of course, clean water, healthy food, clear air, warm shelter, reasonable clothing all contribute to the healthy body; anything that supports my necessity of health by definition is a necessity.
While I was forced to slow down and rest in relative stillness with my sore shoulder I reached for my books. Ah, if I can’t be moving about, bustling about, getting things done, then I can always take time to read. I discovered another necessity:reading material. (And if you were to visit Rosemary and me in our home you would quickly realize how necessary books are in our lives!)
And as many of you who have read my posts may remember, I write three pages of long hand notes every morning as recommended by Julia Cameron in her book The Artist’s Way. Pen, ink, paper are consumed in my practice. Necessity? This one is on the thin edge. I use my page writing to tune into my inner self, my intuition, and I use what I write, at least in part, as a guide to the rest of my day. Do I need to write it down? Does the process of writing promote the information that comes through to me? Of course there are other ways to receive or get in touch with these intuitive insights. And maybe there is no real need to record the information that comes through. So, maybe I have found a line here.
The point is to “assess.” What are the necessities in your life? How much is enough? It’s a good exercise.
But then Rosemary switches gears a bit when she says:
Humanity is evolving and each of us must step into our power, our empowerment, our Purpose. YOU ARE ENOUGH, just as you are, today!
And you have enough. Assess the necessity of everything in your life. Does it serve your Purpose? You might be surprised at the answers you get when you ask this question!
Wow! I am enough. I have enough. And whatever is serving my purpose is what I need! Health? Check. Books? Check. Pages? Check! My pages do serve my purpose, so they are on the necessity side after all.
Assessing necessity with Purpose as the backdrop is the more meaningful way to answer the question, “how much is enough?
Meanwhile my shoulder got so bad I asked Rosemary for help. I am living with, partnered with a healer! And I finally got around to asking for a healing! As I write this I am feeling much better. We both picked up that my pain may have been triggered by raking, but something else was allowed in, something physical and also something spiritual. The physical is like a viral attack, like a cold in my shoulder; I’m treating it like a cold. And the spiritual? Rosemary detects that my heart-mind center is opening. More on that later!
Do the necessities in your life support your purpose? You’ll feel great when they do!
ROSEMARY’S EXPLORATION: Assess the Necessity
Each person has a different definition of what is necessary in their life. To some, a fancy car fits into that category. To others, it is private school. Some consider necessity to include only one pair of serviceable shoes and to others, a different pair for each outfit in the closet.
Ours is not to judge what another considers a necessity in their life. However, it is important to decide consciously what is a necessity in Your Life.
Have you been thinking that a partner is a necessity in your life? Maybe you are avoiding doing some personal growth work to reclaim disowned parts (often the powerful ones) of your own Self and you have been misled into believing that another person will bring you to wholeness.
Do you have an amount of money that is a necessity for you to feel safe and secure? Is money something that you chase because you feel you never have enough, or that you never are enough?
The word, necessary, itself can be reduced to air to breathe, water to drink, food to eat (and less than we in the Western world are used to!) and maybe shelter from storms. As I write this, many thousands of people have been tragically struck by nature’s ferocity and have reduced their definition of what they really need to these few things.
And, yet, we somehow feel that we need more, we need to BE more.
Look at your ‘necessities’ and decide if they are really necessary to your life and to your happiness. Look at your relationships and ask if you really need more from the other person. Look at your career or business or work. What is really necessary there?
Appreciate how much you have beyond the basic necessities of life. We live in a society where we have music wherever we go. We drive cars or travel on trains and buses and planes to move from place to place. If you are reading this you have a computer or a smartphone on which to read it. You will probably come into contact with at least one other human being in the next week, if you wish it, so you are not totally alone in the world.
In November in the US we celebrate Thanksgiving and everyone speaks of Gratitude as if it’s a once-a year concept. Of course, most of us remind ourselves to feel gratitude often but we sometimes forget that we have huge blessings every day about which we can feel gratitude. What are your blessings beyond the necessities?
And it’s important to think of yourself as more than enough! You have a mission, a purpose, in being on the Earth at this time. You have all the resources available to you to complete your mission, to fulfill your purpose. Are you aware of that? Have you done the personal work to identify your Soul Purpose so that you can arrange your life to focus your energies on living that Purpose? Have you cleared the blocks that hold you into thinking that you are not enough? that you don’t have enough?
Humanity is evolving and each of us must step into our power, our empowerment, our Purpose. YOU ARE ENOUGH, just as you are, today!
And you have enough. Assess the necessity of everything in your life. Does it serve your Purpose? You might be surprised at the answers you get when you ask this question!
PS: You too may experience channeled messages from Rosemary. In fact you can receive personal messages from Guides, Spirits, Angels and loved ones who have crossed over at the next event: a Conversation with The Other Side December 6 at 7:00 pm Eastern. Click for details
ROSEMARY’S INSPIRATION: Assess the Necessity
My “Two-Minute” video for the week: Assess the Necessity
Note: this clip was taken from our October gathering for Satsang.
PS: You too may experience channeled messages from Rosemary. In fact you can receive personal messages from Guides, Spirits, Angels and loved ones who have crossed over at the next event: a Conversation with The Other Side December 6 at 7:00 pm Eastern. Click for details
MONDAY’S POEM: Journey
Inner work. Intuition. Practice. Here’s part of the work, exposed for all who have ears:
Journey
Beyond the cave
Below the lake
Deep in the heart
Of the savannah
There is a gate.
Beyond the gate
Blow through space
Deep emptiness
In a Universe
Toward escape.
Beyond escape
Below the Star
Deep in the Soul
Of the Light Body
There is a Seed.
Beyond the Seed
Fed by the lake
Raised by the Star
Of the brightest light
There is a Man.
©2013 Richard W. Bredeson. All rights reserved.
How Do You Do Intuition?
In yesterday’s post I commented on an article by Rosemary: Success-Based Intuition. But maybe I put the cart before the horse (no reference to Monday’s poem intended!). Do you know how to access your intuition so you can use it for success? I mentioned somewhat humorously that I rely on Rosemary’s gut in important matters. We do share our feelings, especially gut feelings about our unfolding life and partnership. And I am the first to say Rosemary is more attuned to her intuition than most people I know. I also admit that I sometimes struggle with tuning into my own intuitive ability. I have to work at it!
How do I work at it? I had to think about this because our homework assignment for Rosemary’s Unlocking the Mysteries of Intuition class yesterday was to report on how we used intuition through this past week. Here is part of my homework report:
As one example I did get my pendulum out to test a decision. I learned dowsing and the use of a pendulum to help with decision making from Rosemary years ago. In my use this week my pendulum confirmed the decision I was leaning toward, so I made that decision. And I think it was a good one. Another example was a hit I received while writing my “Morning Pages” which I do almost every morning – three hand-written pages following Julia Cameron’s recommendation in her The Artist’s Way. As I look at this one example I realize I frequently get good intuitive hits when I write these pages.
A third example of how I “do intuition” is through the use of card decks of different types, from Tarot to oracle-type decks. I am currently using two decks, the Goddess Guidance Oracle Cards by Dr. Doreen Virtue, and the Aleister Crowley Thoth tarot deck (an interesting balance of light and shadow between these decks!). I draw two cards every morning after my “Pages” to tune into the energies for the day. And I always receive excellent guidance.
But these are technologies or aids in tuning in. There is a more fundamental part of this intuitive process. And this is what I wrote in my pages yesterday:
These [intuitive] flashes come to me when I am at ease, breathing, present and open. They aren’t forced. They aren’t thoughts or ideas, really. They don’t come from the ego. They come when I care. They come when I am feeling at peace, in grace. In this sense they are natural, instinctual but much more than animalistic. There is a higher consciousness to them.
And it is true they can only come from love. And this self-love is a mysterious thing. It, again, is not the ego. It is much higher. It approaches Self-Love. It is a loving state rather than a narcissistic self-love state of the ego. This is a key point, a key distinction. There is an at-one-ment to this love. This cycles back to atonement – forgiveness – grace. There is an inner sense of groundedness that gives rise to gut feelings. Again, it is a natural place of higher consciousness. It comes when there is a deep connection within, to that which is below and that which is above!
Intuition is a hard thing to grab hold of. But I think we all know what gut feelings are. The trick is to tune in, trust, then follow. It takes practice. We all can do it, even us guys!
PS: Do you want to see a Master Intuitive at work? Are you looking for answers? Inspiration? Every 3rd Saturday of the month, at 7:00 pm Eastern time, Rosemary hosts Satsang for all who would join her in the exploration of expanding consciousness. Here is your chance to ask questions of The Divine Feminine! This event can be attended in person and online using video-conferencing services, even a phone. Attend from anywhere in the world!
Get more information and sign up here The next Satsang with Rosemary is tomorrow, November 16 at 7:00 pm Eastern.
Men and The Goddess 